Summer, Summer, Summer Time... What to-do!

Well, I survived my mom's birthday...  I felt pretty (actually VERY) blah all day, but thank God for my children who always brighten my days.....well, except for when they are all fighting with each other or whining at me for something or "ignoring" me when it's time for chores...... (just kidding... or maybe not!)
Anyway, I really am having a hard time with this birthday; she would've been 60 years old yesterday and that's one of those "big deal" birthdays.  I have memories in my head of how she used to look and how she looked as the cancer took over her body and it's weird for me to imagine what she would look like at 60....  and that make me sad!!

Sorry for the blah-ness....  I'll now move on to a happier "subject" (subject being MamaKat of course)...



10 Things TO-DO in June

1) Get through the "last days of school"... Locker/desk clean-outs mean big messes at home, class parties and buying teacher gifts!! This feels like a big move-up for my kids this time... In a few short months CJ will be a junior (yikes), Ethan will be a freshman (double yikes), Joseph in 5th grade (wowzers) and my baby girl Angie in 2nd grade (WOWZEEE).  WHERE.DOES.THE.TIME.GO?

2) Summer Cleaning... always, the first few days of summer vacation consistent of "summer cleaning" (mom of the year, huh?).  The kids have to clean out their closets of too small clothes/shoes, under their beds etc...

3) Get Ethan to the dentist for his pre-braces work... and then to orthodontist for braces.... yay, starting freshman year with braces (again... mom of the year?)

4) Get Winnie's sutures removed... she had cysts removed from both sides on the back of her hips.  In a couple days she'll get the sutures removed and she can finally get a bath!  Thank goodness, because she S-T-I-N-K-S!

5) Get cabinets, counter tops, new tub, tiles etc... ordered for our kids' bathroom RE-MODEL.  FUN.... seriously!

6) Get bathroom ready for re-model... everything cleared out and move what isn't being demolished etc... NOT fun!

7) Spend a few days at the resort with the kids...  we love to do this!!  Even though we won't be far from home, it still feels like a get-away vacation!!

8) Celebrate CJ's 16th birthday... yes, on June 21st, my first born baby will be of legal driving age! OH MM GEE....

9) Beach, beach beach...  whenever, wherever and with whoever... we love the beach and we love the water!!  'nuff said!

10) Spend the last week doing all I can with the boys, as they will be gone with their Dad through the entire month of July.... This is one of my least favorite times of the year, (aside from when they're away from me on one of the holidys).  Even though it's MUCH quieter, things just are NOT the same without them home!!

Thanks for sticking around...

Writer's Workshop: Spring Means.......

BIRTHDAY SEASON in our family!!!!

Joseph's 10th birthday (TODAY!!!)

Well, technically, it's Spring AND Summer, but it all starts early, early on in Spring!!

I love birthdays... I love planning dinners and parties and decorating.  And of course I love MY birthday.  So this time of year is one of my favorites.
We have a tradition in our house where we all decorate the kitchen/bar area for the birthday person so they can wake up to it ....  The kids love it, I love it and I think it's something great for the kids to carry on as they get older.

So, back to the BIRTHDAY SEASON....  We've got:
March:    Gamps (my Dad)
April:       Me, Angie and Joe's sister
May:        Joseph
June:        CJ
July:         Joe
Then I get a bit of a break until October/November...


Head over to MamaKat's WW....

I Met a Boy and I liked It......

I'm so excited to be back to blogging....  I really truly enjoy it!!  I love to "meet" new people and I need to get my thoughts out!!!
I'm even more excited to back to Writer's Workshop!!! 



When I read the prompt "Describe where you where when you met a boy", I couldn't stop thinking about the Katy Perry song (I kissed a Girl) and have since been singing-- I met a boy and I liked it...... and now I've probably got that song stuck in your heads as well, huh?  Sorry----- or not!!  :-)

Anyway,  I'm going to tell you about where I was (and more of course, because I am a rambler) and what transpired when I met this boy:

I was just separating from my ex-husband and starting my life as a single, working mom (while we were married, I staed at home with the kids).  I had just started working at an Environmental Consulting firm and was meeting all of my new co-workers.......  and there he was---- JOE!!  He was so nice, welcoming and friendly (and handsome to boot) and I was immediately drawn to his smile!
I was going through a break-up AND he was going through a break-up , so we became fast friends.  I always thought he was cute, but NEVER would've elaborated on it because of where I was in my life....... Sooooooo, everyday I would go to work, excited to see him and talk to him; and everyday I would make sure I found a reason to involve him in my work.

As time went by, I started going out with my co-workers on the Fridays that the boys went to their dads.  I had a great time!!   Joe and I started talking on the phone more often and eventually we would go out alone... as friends!!

We had a GREAT friendship; and has the months passed we went from being "just friends" to "more than friends" (wink-wink!!)  I still remember where we were when we had our first kiss.  We had been out downtown and it was late.  Me and my girlfriend were leaving his house to go home and as she walked out the door I closed it, turned around and planted one on him (I still believe that had I not made the first move, we may not be where we are now).

And shall I say, the rest is history....

Dear Santa....

I haven't joined MamaKat and her writing projects in a LONG.... VERY LONG.... time. You know, I just haven't felt very creative; so, as to not bore everyone, I just stepped back for a little while....

But, in the spirit of Christmas, I have decided to jump back in.... hope you still like me Mrs. MamaKat!!

Dear Santa-
I think I have been pretty good this year…. I may have been a little mischievous during and after a night out with friends… but besides that, I am a good.girl. The kids have been (dare I say it) good; I mean they have their moments…boy do they ever….but they are kids and well, Kids.are.kids. In the grand scheme of things, the kids have been good….they are even getting into the hang of getting their chores done without me telling them over and over!!
Let me first get past the whole “I want good health, peace, love and happiness for all”, because who doesn’t want that….. but there are a few things that I want:

A new laptop--- mine hit the crapper a few months ago and I have been (gasp) sharing with CJ and Joe… and Santa, I don’t like to share (shhhhh!!!)

A new camera--- I do like the one I have now, but you know I hate the fact the screen is messed up and has that black circle on it…. Which causes EVERYONE to mention it anytime they are taking a picture….even I have already told them not to worry about it.
And since you are getting me a new camera, I’d actually like one a bit bigger and fancier…. Pleeeassseee!!!

A good, long massage--- do I need to explain.....

But, Santa... what I really, really, really want is.....

for these 4 kids to have the best Christmas ever.... You know I love these little hellions (err, I mean angels) with all my heart-- and I love making memories and traditions to carry on for all of theie lives....

Writer's Workshop - My Mom!!!

When I read MamaKat's writing assignment prompts, it made me kind of sad.... every prompt has something to do with a mom. And even though her prompts were to write about different aspects of our lives and/or our moms; it's still just the thought of HER that makes me sad. She.is.not.here. She was only 52 and she should be here!!!!

Anyway- I chose to write a poem to my mom.....

:)

I can't remember the time I first felt your loving touch

But it was from that moment on, I know you loved me so much

-

I always say, you were more than just my mother,

A confidant, a comforter, a friend like no other

-

You were so strong and fought so hard, it sucked to see you in pain!!

I hate that cancer took you from us and that I will never get to talk to you again!!

-

It was because of YOU, that I am the woman I am today!!

I hope I make you proud; and that's all I have to say!!

I love you and I miss you terribly mom.... it doesn't get any easier not having you here with me!!!

Writer's Workshop --- She's My Girl!!!

Poor MamaKat has been sick, sick these past few days; so I am going to make this writing assignment extra special to help cheer her up.

I have had a few best friends over the years; and a couple friends that I can really call my best friend now. I had a childhood best friend, Susan, who lives out of state now; but we still e-mail and keep in contact. I had an adolescent/high school/college best friend, Nikki, who I did everything with, shared everything with, got into all kinds of trouble with and learned a lot with. Over the years, we have sort of lost touch, although we still talk periodically and we really are trying to get together soon.

My two best friends now are Blondie and Brunette (remember when I talked about them HERE)….. and today I am going to tell you about Blondie (not sure if she would want me to use her name on here).


We met about 6 years ago… her husband and Joe (and I) worked together (this is before they started their own company together) and they had all been friends with each other since college. Joe and I had just recently started hanging out and he finally brought me “out” with HIS friends. We went to a UCF football game, and I knew she would be there. I was a little nervous because even though Joe and I weren’t officially dating yet, I still wanted his friends to like me. We hit it off right away…. I remember we were eating hot boiled peanuts and talking about how good they were.

Over the years, we began talking more and more…. And after she had her first child, we became even closer. I was with her for most of her labor until she had to get a c-section; and then my mom went to visit her the next morning in the hospital (one of the only times they got to talk before my mom died). Our daughters have always been very close, so we would see each other often. Then she had her second daughter and I remember going to the hospital everyday during post-partum and sitting/talking with her for hours. And then her Dad died….. I believe I was a “help” to her during that time. I believe that through my experience of losing my mom, I was able to help her understand her feelings.

The real crazy thing is that we pretty much have opposite views on politics, yet we NEVER argue about it and can still be civil about it, if it ever comes up.

As the years have gone by, and the kids are getting older, we have been able to go out and do more stuff alone. Of course we still have play dates/swim dates with the kids; but it is nice to also go out and just “whoop it up” (and that we do). We have gone on quite a few vacations together… both with our men and just alone. Actually, our first girls trip together was to the Bahamas; and what an awesome time we had!! We have been to many, many concerts together too, as we have the exact same taste in music. We both love football and actually have in depth conversations about the players and games.

Atlantis Resort in the Bahamas.....

At CHEERS in Boston...

Now, we pretty much talk every day, sometimes twice a day. As a matter of fact, lately we’ve gotten into the habit of a “morning call”, where as soon as we are both in the car, we’ll call each other and chat until we both get to work. It is a great start to the day, as we can laugh or vent or whatever we need to get off our chests.

I cherish her friendship very much. It is so good to have a friend who you can trust and who shares a lot of common interests. I am so glad she came into my life!!

Writer's Workshop-- If My Dogs Could Talk......

This week, MamaKat wants to know... If my dogs could talk, what would I want to ask them...

I have two dogs… a 15-year old Bluetick Coonhound named Daisy...

and an 11-year old English Springer Spaniel named Eddie....

Daisy was Joe’s dog and Eddie was my dog before we lived together…. And now they are OURS… At first they did not get along AT ALL….as a matter of fact, they barked and fought with each other so much we usually had to separate them. Things are better now, although they do still have their moments; but if they could talk, I’d like to know:

1) Daisy: Why do you constantly bark at Eddie?? Why can’t he even walk into the room or by you without you barking right in his face?? Oh and on that barking subject… are you losing your hearing and that’s why you bark at such a HIGH decibel?? And why do you follow us everywhere we walk... and can’t settle until one of us is sitting somewhere?

AND

2) Eddie: Why do you randomly growl and squeal, even if you are just sitting on the couch? Why do you run from me when I am trying to give you your medicine, wrapped in meat…and then force me to shove it down your throat?? And on the medicine subject, does that Xanax really help you feel level headed?? I mean, you definitely act like a more relaxed dog, without that crazy look in your eyes…. But is it really from the Xanax that you take twice a day...or because you knew that if you didn't stop growling, snapping and biting at the kids (and everyone else for that matter) that you might not be around to see your 12th birthday?? :)

AND

3) This is for both of you: Why is it that you chose the middle of the night, while we are trying to sleep, to lick every part of your bodies for hours (with that slurping sound)…. And then get hairballs, so you end up coughing and gagging on the hair…in our room….while we are in bed….???

Inquiring minds want to know……

The First Day of..........

My crazy, hectic (but wouldn't change it for the world) life......

That was the day, my 4th child.... my 1st daughter, came into our lives!!! That was the day when all sanity left my head (well not really... but it sounds good for effect)!!

It's funny how each of my children have their own unique personalities, quirks, good and bad moments and challenges. CJ and Ethan were pretty easy babies (well, except for the colic that Ethan had for 3 months), toddlers, kids etc... Angie has been somewhat easy, in that she was a fast talker, walker, learner and can do alot of stuff on her own pretty fast; which frees up a hand for me. AND THEN THERE'S JOSEPH....

Please don't get me wrong... I love my Joseph... as a matter of fact, I have always babied him a little more than I should... he was born early, was very sick in the NICU for 2 weeks, was a baby when we divorced (which I ALWAYS felt guilty about), has always been little and somewhat "behind" on his progress...so, I think I have always felt like I had to nurse and baby on him a little extra....and for that, I am paying for now!!
He is the MOST.STRONG-WILLED.CHILD in this world....believe me.... he fights me for anything I say or ask him to do...

Me: Joseph, pick-up the mess
Joseph: I didn't do it
Me: I didn't ask WHO did it
Joseph: well I am not cleaning what I didn't do
__________________________________
Me: Joseph, go sit in time-out and don't get-up
...a little bit later (after he's been in time-out)
Me: Joseph, go put your stuff away and then you can go back and play
Joseph: No, you told me not to get up
__________________________________
Me: Joseph, hold my hand while we cross the street
Joseph: No, I'll hold your arm
Me: No, hold my hand
Joseph: no, I'll hold your wrist
Me: NO, HOLD MY HAND
Joseph: No, I'll hold your finger...
__________________________________

Do you get were I am coming from....??? Do you understand my frustrations and struggles with him...?
Yesterday we were in a band store, getting Ethan stuff, and Joseph grabs a kazoo off the counter (that didn't belong to us), puts it in his mouth and starts blowing on it...then puts it back in the box and walks away. The guy at the counter looks at me and says "well, now you have to buy it".... great, thanks!!

AND, then, I got him home (ready to pull his hair out--- and no, I didn't reall do it), opened his planner and found a note from his teacher "joseph was very talkative and silly in class today...couldn't settle him down".... great, thanks!!!

There are some times/days/moments where he is a little angel...and he always wants to love on me....and during those moments I am thankful.... but then I am just waiting for the next defiance...always waiting to pull my hair out... arrrgghhhh!!!

Any advice on dealing with a hard-headed, strong-willed child?

Check out more wrtiting fun at MamaKat's house!!! :)

First Day of School!!

Dear MamaKat, have you missed me?? I have been bad...very bad...very, very bad..about doing my "assignments"; but I figured that since the kids are back in school..... well, I better get back to "MamaKat's school"!!

The 5 Best things on the first day of school:

5. Angie now has to wear a uniform (at least a uniform shirt).... this now means I don't have to spend so much money on clothes for her to "stay in fashion"!! :)

4. Angie's pre-k3 teacher moved up (into the VPK-4) with her, which made for a very smooth and easy transition into a new class!!

3. I got to watch as my big boy (8th grader), CJ, helped his younger brother (6th grader), Ethan, "learn the ropes" of being a middle schooler......

2. AND watched as the 2 older boys helped their younger brother, Joseph, "learn the ropes" of waiting in the gym (instead of the lunchroom) now for his teacher!! It always makes me feel good to see them looking out for each other and taking care of each other....... even if it doesn't last long!! :)

The number 1...the BEST thing that happened on the first day of school........ My little Joseph walked right into the gym and sat down, waiting for his teacher, WITH NO TEARS!!!!!!! That's right.... we did not repeat last years fiasco of crying, screaming, kicking, clinging to me...only to be peeled off by his teacher as she quickly shut the door on me.....and then me having to drive to work in tears myself!!! NOT.THIS.YEAR. (he's a big boy now--- he says).... and as a matter of fact, he told me "OK mom, you can go now"!!!

Go check out more Writer's Workshops at MamaKat's house!!!

And PLEASE, PLEASE go over and check out CJ's blog.... he's so excited to be writing a blog like his momma...and it makes him feels good when he gets comments!! :)

Where Do I Want to be Right Now......?

I am late, I know..... but I still made it..... I couldn't miss another assignment, so I walked uphill both ways in the rain to get my Writer's Workshop assignment done....... Where do I want to be???

It would be really easy for me to say that I would much rather be on the beach somewhere....sitting in a lounge chair, sipping a Corona, running my fingers and toes through the sand, watching my kids build sand castles......yes, I would like that right now..... I am truly a beach girl.......
BUT, where I would really, really, REALLY like to be is sitting in my mom's living room, WITH HER ALIVE, talking to her...telling her about what the kids have been doing, telling her about Julie and how I hate cancer.... telling her my problems and the things that are bothering me and listening to her tell me that everything will be ok!!!!
Yes, I would much rather be visiting with my momma than sitting on the beach relaxing...... my mom could make everything feel better.....and I would give anything to have an evenign with her again........... until we meet again in Heaven, I will just dream......and write to her in my journal!!! :)

Writer's Workshop --- Gifts!!!

Wow, things are so quiet around here right now….. too quiet…. the boys went to stay with their Abuela for a few days and it is way too quiet!! Don’t get me wrong, I do enjoy some silence……but only for a few minutes and then I miss the hustle & bustle that is my life!!!

Oh well....I guess it gives me time to finish my “assignment” for MamaKat, who probably thinks I am a terrible student….. seeing as I have been skipping class and forgetting to do my “homework”.....… I will make it up to you MamaKat…. I will try to hook you up with my BFF Ellen DeGeneres!! :)

Anyway, this is an easy one for me this week because of the recent loss of my great friend, Julie…I have chosen prompt #3... to describe a memorable gift and why it is important to me!!! Obviously this is easy for me, as it is a gift (gifts) from her that I will tell you about....

On this table, it may not seem like alot of things..... but there is a alot of meaning in it all.... These are the gifts I received for my birthday this year (in addition to the awesome shopping spree that Joe took me on); and just about every one of them came from Julie.

She loved giving gifts.... she loved to make people happy.... every Christmas (and other holidays) and every birthday anyone had (especially the neighborhood children), she would go out and get something for that person.

While my mom was alive, she started a collection (for me) of "Willow Tree" figurines/angels... I love them... I have a few from my mom and then a few more from my friends; and each and every one of them means something to me.
I am also a big fan of Bath & Body Works... I could spend all day in there looking around and smelling new scents etc...

Actually, in one of the bigger shopping plaza's by us, there is a B&BW and a Hallmark right next to each other....... and on M-A-N-Y occasions, Julie and I would go shopping (or "window" shopping) together. She used to joke that she wanted to catch up with me on her own collection of Willow Tree angels, so if any of mine ever went missing "I would know where to look"!!!

So, on this past birthday, she went ALL OUT... she gave me a gift bag full of Bath & Body Works soaps, hand gels/foams, and lotions. And she gave me 3 (three....yes, three......) Willow Tree's: 1)The Birthday Girl, 2) The Angel of Giving and 3) Sisters at Heart.....

The "Sisters at Heart" meant (means) SO,SO, SO much to me..... it made her and I feel that we were more than just friends.... I loved her more than just my buddy..... She was like a sister to me.... we were "Sisters in Heart"!!!! I Miss You Honey!!!!

Tomorrow I will........

I am feeling kind of down today...... no, actually ALOT down.... Last night I reached my breaking point with my children and it put me right over the edge.... I am dealing with 4 children, all at different ages and stages....all with different challenges.

There is CJ is about to be a teenager...with a teenager attitude; Ethan who is very introverted and doesn't really socialize, but gets upset with me for not spending enough time with him (which I constantly try to do), Joseph who is THE.MOST strong-willed child you have ever met---e-v-e-r....a constant battle with him, and Angie who is 4..... and is 4!!

And then there is the constant battle with "taking sides" and "picking favorites"....which I do not do...as a matter of fact, I try real hard to stay out of their fights, so that no one will think I am picking sides.

Oh and then there is the constant battle at dinner time...always somebody doesn't like something and we have to hear about the whole meal time.... we can't just have normal dinner conversations....

SOOOOOO..... I have decided, TOMORROW I WILL stop being so hard on myself......and will try really hard to just let things go!!

I will not let Joseph get under my skin and make me have to yell..... I will just let it go (and walk.away.) when he complains about something not going his way!!!

I will not let my feelings get so hurt when CJ tells me that I act like I am always upset with them...or when he gives me the cold/silent treatment because he is not getting his Clarinet Reeds until tomorrow...... I will let it go and remember that he is about to be a teenager and he.will.have.attitude.

I will learn to just relax..... and remember that they are.just.kids. And I will continue to raise them in the rigth direction, with a "firm hand", but will not be brought to tears every night because I am so frustrated about something that one of them has done!!!
I will not feel sorry for myself because I am practically doing this all.on.my.own..... as the boy's dad (my ex) works so much that he doesn't have a big part in their rearing!!! I will JUST BE!!!


Awww..... thanks MamaKat... I needed that assignment this week.... Gosh, who ever thought homework could be therapeutic????

Writer's Workshop - A Poem to My Mom!!

Mrs. MamaKat, I am back.... I have been a bad, bad student..... but I served my detention and now I'm back for class!!!! (yes, I know...I am a dork...whatever...)

For my Writer's Workshop assignment this week, I chose prompt 4: "write a poem for my mom"..... Mother's Day will never be the same for me...EVER.... I know I have my own children who love on and pamper me on Mother's Day (which I TRULY appreciate); but I still miss MY mom.... I miss buying that perfect card (she was a huge card person...and would spend hours in Hallmark searching for the "right" one), bringing her a little gift and loving on and pampering her..... I.just.miss.her.TERRIBLY. And this time of year only magnifies it 1,000%.

In LOVING MEMORY of my WONDERFUL Mom!!!

Did you ever know that you’re my Hero?
I hope I told you enough for you to know!!

We had the best kind of mother/daughter relationship
And oh, how you loved me so!!

I could tell you all my thoughts & feelings
No matter how wrong or right they were

You could always make it “all better”
And that is one thing I knew for sure

Even though I am a mother now myself
Mother’s Day will never be the way it used to be

Instead of having a fun day together,
I will be visiting you at the cemetery

I miss you Mommy more and more all of the time;
The pain just doesn’t go away!!

I will hold close the memories that we shared;
And in my heart they will forever stay!!

Writer's Workshop & 34 Years Ago......

34 years ago today, I was a brand new baby… snuggled up in my mama’s arms… beginning my life!!! Happy Birthday to me…. Yay…. I am not one of those people who like to keep their birthday hidden; or don’t like for people to acknowledge!! I love my birthday… I love for people to oooohhh and aaaahhhh over me!! Ever other day of the year, my life is dedicated to taking care of my children & Joe (and I do.not.mind. that AT ALL, of course); so on this one day, I like for people to take care of me… I don’t have to cook or clean or have any responsibility other than having a good day!!

You know, two of my biggest birthdays in the past, I was pregnant for--- on my 21st birthday, I was pregnant with CJ… But I did still buy alcoholic drinks….just not for me…. Any time anyone needed a new drink, during our night out, I would go get it; you can imagine the stares I got as a 28 weeks pregnant woman carrying around beers… hee-hee!! Oh, and then on my 30th birthday, I was pregnant with Angie… so, instead of the big 3-0 birthday bash I had planned on for soooo long, I was waddling around with a baby up in my ribs!!

Ok, Ok, Ok… enough birthday talk….. BUT, if any of you want to “get me a gift”, you can just leave me a comment, or “follow me” or even “grab my button” and share the love….. or, the BEST yet, you could blog a birthday wish for me… oooohhh, that would be too cool!!! Ok, Ok, Ok… I really I am done now…. And I p-r-o-m-i-s-e, I am NOT a narcissistic person… it’s just like I said… I love my birthday!!

So, onto my writing assignment…. I haven’t been to MamaKat’s class in a few weeks; but I am back and ready for her challenge!! This week I have decided to go with her 3rd prompt: “tell about a local news story that is all the BUZZ”.

By far, the biggest news story around my neck of the woods is about little Caylee Anthony… I am sure many of you have heard of this story as well and I am sure it has sickened you as much as it has me!! Last July, a mother (Casey Anthony) finally reported her daughter missing after she had supposedly been missing for 6 weeks……her excuse for waiting that long was that she said she was doing the investigating herself…Uh yea, ok!! After months and months of lots of speculation, lots of searching for Caylee, lots of media coverage, the mom (Casey) being in and out of jail… that sweet 3 year pld’s body was found in a garbage bag in some woods close to their home….. so, so, so sad!!

There are so many twists and turns in this story that I can’t even write about them all or we would be here all night long…. But what I do know is that mama killed her baby…. I don’t necessarily think it was a pre-meditated murder, but I do think some terrible accident happened and then she tried to cover it up…. Either way, I think Casey (the mom) is a self-centered, self-absorbed sociopath and I hope justice gets served (and before anyone gets mad, I do know that legally she is “innocent until proven guilty”….but the cards are definitely stacked against her)!!