Why, oh Why can't I get my Ethan to understand that?? Ethan, my second born son...my little sweetheart, people-pleaser, rarely gets into trouble (besides the sibling fighting), gifted, way above his grade level student. I had the parent/teacher conference for report cards this morning with Ethan's teacher and like always, she had nothing but nice, king, complimentary things about him-- about how smart and "gifted" he is, how he is reading and learning 2 or 3 grade levels above (and I'm not just saying that because he's my boy--believe me, I have a slow-learner at home too); but he still received a "C" in one of his classes.... what??? "C"??? Ethan has NEVER received a "C" in any grade in any class!! And do you want to know why he received that "C" (and the very low A's, instaed of high A's)??? Because he is not organized and does not turn in his homework!! He does it...every night!!! But he gets to school and 1) can't find it inhis backpack or 2) has left it sitting at home. The other thing is his planner that has to be signed every night. I have tried to make him be responsible for bringing it to me without me asking (I have to stop holding his hand before he gets to middle school) and if he doesn't ask or he forgets to bring it to me, then I don't sign it and he gets a mark. Is that wrong?? Is it wrong to let him fall a little so he can understand the importance of responsibility and organization?? PLEASE, give me some advice on ways to help him without too much hand-holding???? What are good ways to help him be organized?
Tomorrow is my meeting with Joseph's teacher....wish me luck!! This is the meeting that will help me understand his problems with learning to read and try to figure out what we can do to help him!! I still struggle with the fact that he isn't getting it. I struggle with thinking too far ahead in his life and thinking that if he can't learn to read and excel, then he won't be able to go to college and get a good job to support himself and his family.... arrrggghhh, I know I'm thinking too far ahead, but I. can't. help. it.
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10 comments:
he might need his hand held a little longer. maybe have routine at night to get his backpack together for the next day? I dunno, Im not a mom... so all of this is just theory for me. =)
My oldest is the exact same way. So smart, but either looses it or forgets to turn it in. Until this year, he always waited for me to ask to see his folder but this year he has gotten better. I don't know how or why, I'm just grateful.
I did feel bad though when I forgot to sign something and he had to stand at recess. Oops, bad mama moment.
My middle son is exactly the same way! I do the same thing as as you do. I thing the lower marks might help him to realize what he's doing wrong. they don't like those low marks
I forget how old your son is, but I do know from other parents with boys that organizational skills something many boys seem to lack.
I hope his teacher has some advice.
Good luck!
Organization? I wish I could help you there! :) I've heard about others having the same problem!! My 11-year old daughter apparently got her organization skills from me, but somehow she never forgets to turn in her homework...
I do not at all think it is wrong for you to teach him responsibility and organization.If he doesn't learn now it will be a problem for him later.Trust me I know.
Good luck with Joseph's conference.
By the way having my birthday fall on Halloween was great for the first 6 yrs until my 6th birthday party was interupted by mom going into labor with my sister LOL.J/K it is fun and I love Halloween and now that I have kids it is even more fun.
Oh no...I agree with La Pixie; he needs a strict routine at night. My son is like your son and occasionally forgets and if he got a C well he is grounded from video games and computers...got to stay on these kids now days!
My oldest is identical to what you described. And I agree with the way that you have handled the situation. I do not hold my kids hands and make them do the things that they are supposed to do. The least that they should be able to do is put homework back in their folder.... just like they are supposed to do with their things at home. PUT THEM BACK WHERE THEY GO! I am a strong believer in teaching my kids to be responsible early and if they fall short, they know it is because of their own actions. I commend you on this. You can only SAY it so many times. Low marks might help him learn.
And yes I have considered a Mr. Linky for Tell It Like It TIZ! I'm just a little computer dumb when it comes to these things, but if you think you'd like to participate, I'd LOVE to read what other have to tell! And I'll look into getting one set up!
rewards versus punishment.
Reward when he does it without asking and punish when he fails to do it even after being reminded. I threatened my son with grounding from MY visitation once. It "killed" him that he was not going to get to come with me for the weekend. His step-dad's mother was amazed I would make such a sacrifice. I told her that you have to "hit them" where it "hurts". I need to post that story. Keep working with him though.
My most gifted teenager is the same way...but then her brother who struggles for every B is organized. I dont know why but it always seems that way. I have tried teaching her how to study and be organized but ultimately they have to want to do it!
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