Thursday, October 16, 2008

It's Thursday....You Know What That Means.......

It's MamaKat's Writers Workshop day...... I really do look forward to this post every week, because it makes me be creative; and creative I am NOT. I am good at working the plan once the plans been made...just not good at making the plan...oh, well.... I chose to do prompt #2, to start off a sentence with "I wish someone told me"..... So, here goes:

I wish someone told me that even though I am an adult, living without my mother would still be extremely difficult. Don't take that the wrong way-- I am a grown adult woman who is raising 4 wonderful children, working full time, managing my home and enjoying myself; but I MISS MY MOM.... she was my best friend, she was my support, my medical advice giver, my shopping buddy. You see I am an only child and for 7 years after my mom and dad divorced, it was only her and I; and even after she married my stepdad, we still did everything together....and even after I got married and started having my own children, her and I still did everything together...And even after I got divorced and was trying to regain my independence and start my life over again, her and I still did everything together....and even in the midst of all her cancers and her fighting sickness from chemo and radiation, we.still.did.everything.together. I think about her everyday, I dream about her often, I wish I could call her all throughout the day and tell her "Mom, can you believe Cj's voice is changing...he's going through puberty...oh my" and "Mom, Ethan is so advanced in school and way above his grade level...but I can't get him off his video game"..."Mom, Joseph is struggling in reading...but he can play baseball like a pro", and "Mom, you won't believe the cute outfits I found for Angie...and I can't believe her sassiness...just like me". I knew it would be different, but I thought, that with having my boys and being pregnant with Angie, that I could go on with my own life and that through memories I could move on. I wish someone told me it would be this hard.... Mommy, I miss you!!!!

Me, My mom & Cj-- 2000
***Don't forget to "Follow this Blog"....follow me, stalk me, love me...whatever.....just do it, so I don't feel like a loser!!! :) ***

20 comments:

Diane said...

Thank you for your sweet note :). I know just how you feel... I didn't know how hard it would be either (and I was pregnant when my dad died... that's an emotional roller coaster I wouldn't wish on ANYONE!). Beautiful post... thanks for sharing!

Brandy said...

Your post was so sweet. Losing a parent is a horrible and scary thing. I lost my dad a year ago and some days I miss him so much I feel like I could burst wide open.

I could not imagine life with out my mom yet I'm not ready.

Sometimes Sophia said...

A beautiful post and a wonderful tribute to your mom. Your life sounds full... but missing that special person like your mom never goes away. Your happy memories are your solace. Thanks for sharing.

Joy said...

beautiful post

I unfortunatly don't have that type of relationship with my mother or really any relationship. I do get sad about that I can't have that mother/daughter thing I hope that Abby and I will always have.

Weeksie50 said...

What a beautiful post.
I am sorry for your loss.
I hope that your memories of her will always warm your heart..

La Pixie said...

that was really sweet. I agree with the poster who said it was a wonderful tribute. youre really strong.

Im not as close to my mom, but Im gonna put in more effort. I cant imagine my life without my mom.

Amy McMean said...

What a wonderfully open and honest blog.

scargosun said...

I know how you feel but in a different way. I was so looking forward to the time when my Dad would retire and spend more time with the family but he never got that chance.

tiarastantrums said...

that is very sweet - I never had that - ever. So it is nice to hear from other people - I really hop emy daughter's feel that way about me later in life!

Brandy said...

The calender on my blog is called the human calendar. This guy took several of his friends and took pictures of them in front of his garage pretty darn creative if you ask me. You can go www.humancalendar.com click on the people and scroll all the way down and click on portable calendar and it will give you the code for your blog. I found it off someone elses blog and I loved it.

Stu Pidasso said...

Great post. I empathize in my own feelings towards my dad. Maybe take a page from Mama Kat and write your mom some letters that you or someone else can open and read on a later date. Keep your chin up girl becaus e I see plenty of love for you right here in the comments section.

jenn said...

Very sweet post. I can't imagine not having my mom around. I call her all the time.

Los said...

You had something special with your mom - that is something not everyone has ... she seemed like a great woman.

AFRo said...

That was an awesome post. You obviously made the most of the time that you had with your mom and in the end isn't that what counts? The result are wonderful memories that you will always have and I'm sure that because of her, you will be the same inspiration to your children. After all, we live what we learn along the way.

Michelle said...

What a beautiful post. I almost lost my mom to cancer 9 years ago. It was scary thinking about not having her in my life.

(((((Hugs))))

Anonymous said...

I LOVE my mom so much. I don't know what I would do with out her. She even moved to the same city as me last year to be closer. She goes through withdrawals when she doen't see my kids for more than 2 weeks. I'm very blessed to have her in my life and I do not take that for granted.

It sounds like you didn't either.

Lacey in the Sky said...

My heart is hurting for you. My Mom and I are best friends too. I know your Mom is hearing all of those things you want to tell her everyday...

Rachael Schirano \\ Rachael Schirano Photography said...

what an incredibly beautiful post...i am so sorry for your loss.

Danyele Easterhaus said...

oh, so sweet! i cant imagine how lost you must feel some days...ur post is a beautiful remembrance of a lovely mommy though!

KatBouska said...

I was just thinking about the fact that it's inevitable my Mom will someday leave...I don't care how old I'm going to be when it happens.

I. Will. Be. Devestated.