Thursday, August 14, 2008

What a dream.......

You know I have been having a rough couple of days emotionally!! I've got things going on personally and at home; and I have been feeling pretty down! I just can't figure it out...I have a beautiful home, a great partner, 4 wonderful children, a loving family, a good job, a nice vehicle, good friends etc.... yet, I still feel like something is missing, like a part of me is gone. When my mom died it broke my heart-- I lost my mom, my best friend, my medical advice giver, my supporter, everything and that took away alot from me and maybe I've still not recovered from that. Maybe I just keep it bottled up deep down inside and have never fully let it out.... Anyway, last night I had a dream with my mom and all I remember is I was at her funeral crying, and as they walked her casket by me I just broke down sobbing. It felt so real, i could feel myself just sobbing (you know the kind of crying where you are shaking as you let it out) and I could feel the pain/heaviness in my heart. Normally when I dream with my mom it is happy--- I dream of us doing stuff together, but she always has to go away......gosh dreams are weird. Maybe I had such a somber dream because I was sad when I went to bed.... I don't know. Anybody have dreams like that???
Sorry this is such a downer today; but sometimes I just need to get that out. i can't always be "super woman"... I do hurt too, just like everybody else!!
Tomorrow is our company's 5th year anniversary party. We are having it on the rooftop lounge of one of our downtown luxury condo buildings.... woohoo!!! I'll let you know how that goes. in the meantime, if anyone has some words of encouragement or a funny joke, I'd love to hear from you...I could use a smile and a laugh!!!

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